Friday, 14 June 2013
Saving lives
The other day I found myself in a position which was thrust upon me with no warning. When people become ill in my line of work there are usually other people in the immediate vicinity and equipment to deal with emergencies. I had neither. I was lead to a person in the middle of nowhere essentially. That is what it felt like. I have undergone years of training and attended many courses. Nothing can prepare you for reality. It is all down to you. Your decision, your actions could alter the course of someone's life.
As soon as I saw this person I knew it was serious which was confirmed when I could find no pulse or signs of breathing. I started CPR & after a short while the patient came back to life. By the time help had arrived they were in the recovery position and regaining consciousness. I will not lie, I needed a change of underwear. The adrenalin surge was so great I was shaking & had to take 5 minutes to regroup. It was almost surreal, as though nothing had happened as everyone went back to their work.
The positives of this experience are of course the person being okay but also it made me feel more confident. Being made to deal with that situation on my own made me realise that I could manage it. It is all very well being surrounded by equipment and colleagues but how do you cope on your own? Of course someone else would have assisted that person if it hadn't have been me but the time difference could have made a difference.
On the other hand there was a negative to my experience. That night I dreamt of my cousin. I dreamt that she had collapsed in a public place and although she didn't survive her family had the chance to say goodbye. Somebody had done the same as I had that day. They had gone to her aid. I woke up from that dream quite distressed. It is something that I have always wished had happened but with the obvious result of her surviving. I now feel very troubled by my actions. Clearly I am pleased I was able to help someone in such a way but it has unearthed so many repressed feelings. It all boils down to that horrible question...what if?
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